that was not a fluke...

whats worth in learning when we end up mugging up things like when so and so happens use this and when this is the case solve like this???
bessel,legendre equations etc,etc...we know when to solve using which formula but we cant get the feel of WHY??...how bessel came at the conclusion,when he encountered the problem which could not be solved by earlier methods and hence he have to give a method....i mean this feeling is the real thing...after this semester i wont remember a single formula and condition!then whats worth in gaining this FEELINGLESS EXPERIENCE!
why dont they give us unsolved problems in our course and evaluate us on the progress made in it by seeing our work,this will be a real contribution...by now i would have already received critics like "ARE U GETTING EVERYTHING WHAT THEY ARE TEACHING NOW IN MATHEMATICS"...
LET ME TELL YOU A SHORT AND 'HANDSOME' STORY:
this dates back to 1st sem exam...me ,ashish and arpit were solving the then most difficult problems of mechanics with a hope that only a miracle can solve it with pens down! then one of my 4 cgpa frnd came and said lemme try,suddenly arpit got annoyed and said u dont even know the formula's (no intensions just coz their were many formula's),obviously he dint had mechanics in that sem,but he did something out of the box,with a different feeling by visualising the situation  and we thought that it was a fluke but now i am writing this coz he is in IITD (thats a proof for society,but i knew his credentials and this FEELING)...by now i am clear why he failed in 2 subjects...and yeah he was not meant to study at NIT CALICUT,he left in the middle.....though i was a bit startled when i came to know that he is not satisfied their also....well life is a learning process and i have learned a lot with a hope that we are here to shift our benchmarks every time.....hope you land at some good place with satisfaction...:) and yes that was 'handsome'
dont know what i am doing by simply learning the names???

i dont know how its SELFLESS??

lets assume that god is feelingless,now plz dont have an attitude that i cant assume such nonsense! by this(god is feelingless) i mean that he is not at all impressed when you feed a poor! will you continue to do this kind of social service if you come to know that god is not going to give you any credit for this???
its our psychology,rather i would say the way we are brought up since childhood,which develops such feelings that helping someone is like a credit in your god's account,i am not sure if god feels the same??
i have seen people taking social service as self credit and debit,just because they are living with a belief that if they do so,they are doing good,what if their is no credit or no recognition or fame for such things??
i am not condemning social service,i am just strucked at the point of credit and debit??is it really like people do it for pleasure,the old people in this profession may be doing this for their pleasure,because they are already at the dusk of their life,and everyone is scared from god (sorry i am being a bit negative,but i can doubt,thats why they are much i the business,now plz dont say that dont coin words like business for social service),but what about the youngsters??do they feel divine in doing so???
coz their was a trend of wearing clothes written om or slokas...is this the same fashion???
i dont mean to target anyone,its just that i simply do not understand this SELFLESS pleasure,i dont know how its SELFLESS???

WHAT YOU WANT BROTHER??

 

if someone wants your valuable comments (valuable coz u stand on their expectations) on something very personal to him,then you cant just say the reality just because u think u are straightforward,coz the moment someone ask u to comment it means he expects something positive from you......
now i am in DILEMMA, i have been to many situation like this when people seek my views just because i stand on their expectation and boost them up!
but their have been situations when people doubt me by saying "you are diplomatic and cunning"...and hence the dilemma....i know people back stabb and defame me just to boost personal image,but its does not frighten me,in turn it gives me a confidence that they  cant speak in front of me and that they feel insecurity from me!!
LISTEN BROTHER,i never went to u (sorry if it seems like i am passing some cheap shots) and started blabbering the goody goods,u came to me with some goody good expectations and so i supported u at that moment,if it would have been opposite u could have coined words like "i am jealous","attitude" bla bla to me.....??
WHAT U WANT BROTHER??seriously "I DO NOT UNDERSTAND"...my mother was correct when she said to me "U CANT EXPECT  THE WHOLE WORLD TO THINK THIS WAY"....
i know people do back stabbing and defame  just to boost personal image,but its does not frighten me,in turn it gives me a confidence that they  cant speak in front of me and that they feel insecurity from me!!ITS BETTER TO TAKE A BULLET ON CHEST THAN TO HAVE IT ON BACK,they wont get it!..
its not my problem,its not your problem,its their problem....and now u can ask "whome u are referring to by calling "THEIR"???

and i dont know what to do!

the moment i am writing this,what is the probablity that i am enjoying in pub??certainly NOT 0! if quantum is about this then one thing is for sure that these physicist are jobless and the scenario is like firing bullets in a dark room!!
now their is a concept of infinite universe (beyond multiverse) which fulfils all the possibilities that a person is doing almost everything in all age,which is a consequence of infinite space and time (infinite universes) (dont know how to explain this)...to feel this "infinite" let me tell u what infinte mean...infinite is the time (say),if a monkey is given a typewriter and he continues to type then he will write "harry poter series"...ponder over it!!! and make other conclusions on your own!
paul dirac the man who laid the foundations of quantum had a wonderful story which says that "my father ill behaved with my mother and he compelled me to speak french and while dining he made me eat food till i vomited if i spelled a single word incorrectly" but the family photographs and the letter conversation of his father with his mother says the reverse what dirac revealed as picture of his dad...isn't it strange!!!
so if quantum says something like "what  i have stated in 1st two lines",its not a big deal???
if someone says "actually we are making things complex without any reason,we are just figuring out things complex because we dont have an answer"...then that someone may be right!...
and i dont know what to do???